The Powerful Words

How do we choose what words we use to express ourselves? A lot of our interactions are predicated on those choices, how we “get our foot through the door” or someone likes us, might very well be a string of characters on some screen somewhere if only in reflection.

Really enjoying the observations of Orwell from the 1940s! He’s by far one of my favorite writers and not for Animal Farm or 1984 (although very brilliant) but for his exploration and careful consideration of the human condition.

One of the most simple (yet hard to break from) word use cases is need vs want. It’s interesting to see how people use it interchangeably, as if they mean the same thing. Convincing your brain that a want is a need, is such a trick, letting the brain win.

When discussing communication the other day and one of the experiences I’ve gone through is to shift into how/what questions; from questions, like why, that demand justifications (assumptions on your part) or questions, like do you, that have yes or no answers. This can also structure your conversations for the other party to explore their own solutions, rather than you offering yours. As well it’s critical for you to establish impartiality.

And in impartiality one can really truly experience listening, no agenda on where this conversation goes, as well, even if you have a solution, freeing yourself from that responsibility.

While this is a shift in mindset and verbiage and looks really simple, it’s one of the most challenging shifts I’ve ever encountered, and it comes up again in nonviolent communication and a myriad of other exercises and approaches.

What can be done today? How will you do it?